aka OCD

Having seen IIT-Delhi through the eyes of quite a LOT of students, and ex-students, by reading their blogs here, some dating right from 2005, I have an image in mind. And right now, I also can't seem to decide whether to be a full-on nerd and study 24-7, or balance acads with extracs. What I also know is whatever I decide, is going to have no consequence on what I actually end up doing. Its just that am very pretty 'vela' (see, am getting hold of the delhi slang) and so, fantasise, more than a fair amount, about my life there.
I may discontinue this blog in a fortnight, I don't know what it is, but am in this 'disconnecting' phase. I don't know what I hate so much about right now, but I just want to start afresh. I want to get rid of my old messenger list, my blog, my memories of school, every thing and every so-called friend in my so-called social circle. I hate the fact that this guy who is supposedly this very-good-also-sometimes-called-the-best friend, is going to the very same place as me. I completely despise it.
What is my problem.(?)
I have no idea.
I am, maybe, still a child, like everybody says I am. I live in utopia. I want everybody to be perfect, the way I believe perfect is. Self-Note: Stop. Am not going there.

I am obsessed. I am compulsive. And I am a disorder.
Stay away.